Ever since I wrote a book on Tinder, guys are always asking me – “what are the best first messages for Tinder?” The fact is, 80% of guys use the EXACT SAME first message over and over when they are messaging women.
They say “Hey, what’s up?”.
Ok, I’ll be honest – they don’t all say “Hey, what’s up?”. They say things like “How are you doing”, “What are you up to?”, “How was your day today?” etc.
You’ll notice that ALL of these first messages are basically IDENTICAL to asking “Hey, what’s up?”.
What you’re really saying is “I don’t have anything to say – do YOU have anything to say?”
Anyway, in my book I share a bunch of really powerful first messages for Tinder that work WAY better than “Hey, what’s up?”. And my buddy Derek made a quick video of some of the most versatile and effective Tinder openers I mention.
Give it a watch!
[Video] The Three Best First Messages for Tinder
Anyway, if you like this video, please give it a like and subscribe to the Love Systems channel. There’s a lot of great Tinder related content on it, including Chris Shepherd’s – How to Use Tinder for Beginners and The Tinder Profile Teardown Show.
What Makes a Great First Message for Tinder
There are a few elements that make a great first message on Tinder.
The three that Derek shared in the video are all great, funny and original messages that will not only get her excited to reply, but also shift the conversation to topics that are beneficial for creating attraction. If you’re interested in creating your own messages though (which I encourage) there’s a few things you should remember.
First, being original helps. If you’re messaging the exact same thing as everyone else, you’re going to wind up at the bottom of the pile.
Second, it’s great if you can add some EMOTION. Most guys are too scared to “rock the boat” with their messages. They don’t want to risk sharing an unpopular opinion or offending her. This is terrible tinder game. Did you know that even if you did accidentally offend her she’s more likely to respond than if you just sent something safe and boring? Share something. Be assertive.
Third, be funny. Tinder isn’t the most sincere and conversational dating platform out there, so if you want to grab her attention, being funny is the way to go. Save your deep, interesting conversation for more mature sites like eHarmony or Match.
And of course, if you’re really serious about upping your Tinder game and taking advantage of all the opportunities it offers, you should buy my book Matches: The Tinder Book for Men.